Fun with glow sticks

Last week, ten volunteers organized and hosted a 5-day GLOW (Girls Leading Our World) camp in Mansa for 14 students and 7 adult mentors from communities throughout Luapula Province. The camp was a smashing success and great fun was had by all as we raved with glow sticks, made s’mores, and taught a delighted pack of pre-teen girls how to do the Wobble in between actual educational sessions on topics such as assertiveness, reproductive health, income-generating activities, HIV/AIDS sensitization, and gender equality.

On the second-to-last day of camp, a British expat working with a local NGO came to assist with a sanitary pad workshop and mentioned that a girls’ group in a district further north in the province was doing a similar project, to great success. These girls were teaching and promoting the use of sanitary pads to classmates in their free time, away from school, because school policy forbade them from coming to class when they were on their periods. The really neat part though, she told us, was that evidently the leaders of the group, two young girls barely of menstruating age themselves and one older woman on the local PTA, had all learned how to make these sanitary pads at a camp which a Peace Corps volunteer had brought them to the year prior.

The first thing that came to mind was wow, that unsuspecting volunteer hit a sustainable development success story gold mine! I wonder who it is? Then it dawned on me: hey, the mentor I brought to last year’s Camp GLOW was a member of the PTA. I asked the woman what the name of the community was, and she told me that the group was in Nshinda. I swallowed. I live in Nshinda. That unsuspecting volunteer was me.

I should have been happy. Proud, even. But instead, all I could feel was embarrassment — I’d had absolutely no idea that this was going on at all. All of my attempts to start a GLOW group at the school with the teachers following the previous year’s GLOW camp had sputtered and died like a lawnmower running over an old shoe. I felt guilty for receiving accolades for something I didn’t do, ignorant for being completely oblivious that this was going on in my community without my knowing, and a little miffed that nobody who did know had told me about it.

Only later, after some conversations with more clear-headed volunteers, was I eventually made to understand that my not knowing about the girls’ group was not an indictment of my failure at community integration. Not only do the girls not speak English and I not know the words for period, menstruation, blood, or sanitary pad in Icibemba, but it wouldn’t matter even if we were best pals who chatted it up in homeroom every Wednesday morning, because talking about menstrual cycles and female genitalia in public is taboo in Zambian culture (and probably no less so if you’ve got a conspicuous foreign male in your midst). One friend reminded me gently that in America, most 7th and 8th grade girls would rather die than discuss their periods with their cute young male teacher. The only way that this group could have been a safe place for pre-teen and teenaged female students to learn and ask questions about periods and sanitary pads was if I were not involved at all.

Slightly mollified but still feeling like a bad volunteer, I resumed working on the slideshow that I was compiling for presentation the following day at the end of camp. But looking through the images captured during the week and then watching the campers’ sparkling eyes the next morning as they watched raptly and giggled every time they or their friends made an appearance on screen, I began to realize that it didn’t matter that I was in the dark about this. The fact that these girls and this mentor had the initiative and drive and leadership to create this project entirely on their own speaks volumes to the core of true development that it is building, a foundation that will remain long after the lines in a Peace Corps volunteer’s resume have eroded away. I realized that this camp is for these girls and women, not for me. It doesn’t matter what I try to do with it, it only matters what they choose to do with it. With this newfound knowledge and experience, these girls are carrying back with them seeds of inspiration that have the potential to grow and change some small but important part of their community, in their small but important part of our world.

And if they can do that, then I’ll be fine never seeing a sanitary pad or hearing about menstrual cycles. Because, I mean, really? That’s gross.

How to make your cat miss you

Got back to site today after spending six nights in Mansa. It was an eventful week:

-I weathered another adventure with transportation in Zambia. The list of things I’m learning to consider as normal includes flagging down a bus at 5:45am by flashing my headlamp through the dark at the oncoming high beams and hoping the vehicle stops. Also unsurprising now is the fact that it takes five hours to travel the 150 miles down to Mansa. And earlier today, the last leg of my trip back up to site involved sitting with eight other people in the open bed of a pickup truck which had POLICE stamped on the sides in big letters. I don’t know if the driver was actually a police officer, but the ride was cheap – I paid the equivalent of $2 to travel 35 kilometers – and it went so fast I swear I was airborne half the time.

-I used my first house days. Peace Corps Zambia volunteers get four days per month that they can spend at their provincial house, but these days can’t be used during Community Entry. The house had no running water and the internet wasn’t working, but I was still able to avail myself of such luxuries as watching movies and eating meat and milk products for the first time in a month and a half. I am more than a little lactose intolerant, and I was more than a little gassy. Worth it.

image

Wild berry Zamsip, a creamy yogurt drink with approximately the same consistency as Go-gurt, and Amarula, a cream liqueur

-I ran errands. Some were fun, like shopping – I found a sweet pair of striped, soft linen shorts for five kwacha from DAPP, Zambia’s most ubiquitous thrift store. Others were not so fun, like renewing my alien registration card so that I can continue to legally live in Zambia for two more months. After which point I’ll have to return to the immigration office and renew it again.

-I collected a month and a half’s worth of mail, receiving a delightful variety of assorted treats from my grandmother and an eclectic collection of items from my family (summer sausage, printed instructions for how to make wooden cell phone stands, corned beef hash, a copy of The Ugly American, Reese’s peanut butter cups, wireless bluetooth keyboards, underwear).

image

Rice and corned beef hash: brings back fond memories of childhood

-I helped prepare for Camp ELITE, a week-long leadership camp for boys planned and run entirely by Peace Corps volunteers. However, after I became immobilized (see below), helping meant that I spent an entire morning copying a quiz and camp schedule onto butcher paper while engaged in a philosophical debate on the difference between cute and sexy.

-On Saturday I accidentally impaled myself on a thick piece of wire sticking up out of the ground. It went straight through my sandal and punctured the ball of my left foot, uncomfortably reminiscent of a pivotal moment in my childhood involving Jeremy stepping on a nail, a distressed parental figure looking for someone to blame, and me running away from home for four hours. Not to worry though! The wire only went a couple of centimeters into my foot, I’ve been religiously treating the wound with antiseptic solution and antibacterial cream the past few days, and I’ve already had my tetanus shot so I won’t get…tetanus. (Is that a thing one can get?)

Although my foot is sore and I’ve been hobbling around for the past few days, it’s healing quickly and with no complications so I’m expected by myself to make a full recovery. And I’ve got to admit that it’s pretty amusing using hand gestures and pantomime to explain to the bamayos how I got my injury. Maybe some of my kids will feel sorry for me and fetch my water.

Pumpkin fried rice

Ingenuity is borne of desperation.

The other night, with the three of us yet-to-be-posted volunteers running dangerously low on kwacha and needing to scrounge together a meal on the cheap, we conducted an experiment to see if we could make a dinner using only the house food supplies (certain basic food staples like rice, flour, spices, and sugar are paid for using the house fees that volunteers pay when they come to stay at the house). We had at our disposal a pumpkin, a few eggs, a few odd leftover vegetables, and lettuce from the garden. From this eclectic assortment of ingredients we cobbled together an unlikely meal: Ryeon whipped up a batch of pumpkin pancakes, Michael excavated the seeds from the pumpkin and burnt roasted them, also assembling a salad with balsamic vinaigrette, and I took everything else and threw it into a skillet and ended up with curry pumpkin fried rice. The meal was startlingly good, and we even had enough leftovers for breakfast this morning.

For the past week I’ve been living at the Peace Corps provincial house in Mansa, waiting to be posted to my site in Nchelenge District. It’s been an interesting few days, mostly because it feels so different. Different from both Pre-Service Training in the quickly receding past and from Community Entry in the imminent future.

Apart from shopping for getting posted to site and a few informational meetings with local government officials, most of the time that I’ve been here has been mine to do with as I please. This starkly contrasts with the highly structured, summer camp-esque programs of PST we were shepherded through for the past three months. What to do with all of this free time? Well, I’ve watched a lot of movies, listened to a lot of loud music (and had a few impromptu dance parties), eagerly scanned TrueReddit to catch up on news articles and essays that I’ve missed, geeked out with photo post-processing, and eaten a huge variety of foods. Oh, and I’ve practically camped out in front of Facebook every day since acquiring the internets. May as well air out all of my dirty laundry while I’m in self-disclosing mode.

I find myself amazed at how quickly I can revert back to a lifestyle so remarkably similar to my daily life back in America. Scene: The day is Wednesday, May 8, 2013, the time is 22 hours. I am sitting on a couch, watching Stand By Me, exchanging surprised noises of recognition with Siobhan and Ryeon when a young John Cusack appears on-screen, laptop perched on my knees, sneaking glances at the day’s baseball scores on ESPN.com. Dorkus, the house cat, brushes up against my leg and then continues on, prowling for his next hapless victim. It’s like I never left home. It feels as if the past three months of living in a one-room mud hut with monstrous spiders on the walls were just a dream.

And then I look ahead and acknowledge once again what I’m too pragmatic to ignore but too emotionally self-regulating to allow myself to dwell upon – I’m about to move into my site, a place where I will be the only white person living for several kilometers in every direction. A place where I am openly stared at and laughed at and talked about when I walk down the tarmac. A place where I will be drawing all of the water I need to use for drinking and cooking and washing and bathing from a well by hand, and cooking all of the food I will eat over a brazier with charcoal lit by matches. A place where half of the people who see me think I am a woman, where nearly everyone thinks I come from China, and where I do not feel even remotely at home. At least, not yet.

It seems scary. I should feel scared. Perhaps I am. Perhaps I deal with fear by ignoring it. By rationalizing it. By talking about it directly while appropriating an attitude of casual detachment and flippant self-disclosure. Hell, I don’t know.

The logical, pragmatic side of me is hovering at my ear, arguing that there’s no point in worrying about something that will happen in the future when you can just tackle it when it comes. The thinking, analytical side of me rifles through the worn pages of my memory, searching for pertinent bits of information to usher to the front of the que as it chatters nonstop about to-do lists and constantly monitors my pulse for levels of stress (low), anxiety (very low), and fear (not getting a clear reading). The feeling, emotional side of me is silent, waiting for the pulse-taker to finish collecting data before deciding upon a course of action. It’s seen this all before.

But if I lean in and listen intently, I think what I’m feeling is a quiet sort of restlessness. I’ve seen nor felt nothing that will fully prepare me for the journey I’m about to embark on so I’m uncertain what to think or feel. Right now, at this moment, I’m sitting at the dining room table in the Mansa prov house, alone with my computer and my thoughts. The house is empty. The Land Cruiser carrying me and all of my clothes and food and house supplies will leave in a couple of hours. My mind wanders. Yesterday I made a couple of experimental clothes hangers out of a ring of 4mm wire I bought from the hardware store earlier in the week. If I can make more than four hangers out of the K15 wire, it’ll be cheaper than buying hangers from PEP or Shoprite. Sure, making hangers takes time and there is an opportunity cost associated with that time, but here in Zambia and in the Peace Corps that opportunity cost is much lower than it would have been in the States.

And this isn’t necessarily a bad thing. I’m reminded of the parable of the fisherman and the tourist:

A boat docked in a tiny Mexican village. An American tourist complimented the Mexican fisherman on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took him to catch them. “Not very long,” answered the fisherman. “But then, why didn’t you stay out longer and catch more?” asked the tourist. The fisherman explained that his small catch was sufficient to meet his needs and those of his family. The tourist asked, “But what do you do with the rest of your time?”

“I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, and take a siesta with my wife. In the evenings, I go into the village to see my friends, have a few drinks, play the guitar, and sing a few songs … I have a full life,” the fisherman responded.

The tourist interjected, “I have an MBA from Harvard and I can help you!  You should start by fishing longer every day. You can then sell the extra fish you catch. With the extra revenue, you can buy a bigger boat.”

“And after that?” asked the fisherman. The tourist responded, “With the extra money the larger boat will bring, you can buy a second one and a third one and so on until you have an entire fleet of trawlers. Instead of selling your fish to a middle man, you can then negotiate directly with the processing plants and maybe even open your own plant. You can then leave this little village and move to Mexico City, Los Angeles, or even New York City!  From there you can direct your huge new enterprise.”

“How long would that take?” asked the fisherman. “Twenty, perhaps 25 years,” replied the tourist. “And after that?” the fisherman asked. “Afterwards? That’s when it gets really interesting,” answered the tourist, laughing.  “When your business gets really big, you can start selling stocks and make millions!”

“Millions? Really? And after that?” the fisherman asked.

The tourist responded, “That’s the best part of all! After that you’ll be able to retire, live in a tiny village near the coast, sleep late, play with your children, catch a few fish, take a siesta with your wife and spend your evenings drinking and enjoying your friends!”

If I lean in and listen intently, I think I simply want the waiting to stop and the living to begin. And that I want some more of that pumpkin fried rice.

Moving

I’m in an odd state of limbo at the moment. We’re in the middle of posting, which is when all of the newly sworn-in volunteers are transported to their sites. Sounds simple, right?

Rule number 7 in the Peace Corps: nothing is simple.

Wait, I take that back. Lots of things are simple. Arguably everything is simple in a place where laundry is done by hand and food is cooked over open fires every day. But nothing is quick and easy. That’s what I meant. And logistics are a royal pain when you’re in a country with a transportation and government infrastructure that is lagging far behind the cellular network coverage. Over the past week and a half I have:

-Crammed all of my belongings into a vehicle, thrice (move over sardines, you haven’t seen packed until you’ve witnessed seven Peace Corps trainees AND all of their continental possessions wedged into a single Land Cruiser)

-Helped cook enough chicken, beef, potato salad, deviled eggs, watermelon, salad, homemade tortilla chips, salsa, guacamole, sweet potato fries, and onion rings to feed 100 people. At one point I had onion rings frying in seven different vats of oil at the same time. I have a newfound respect for caterers and my grandmother.

-Personally hand-served lunch to Peace Corps Zambia country director Tom Kennedy. We’re pretty much on a first-name basis now.

-Checked back into The Barn Motel near Lusaka and had my first hot shower since staging in Philadelphia nearly three months ago. Pure bliss.

-Was sworn in as a Peace Corps volunteer during the Swearing-In Ceremony at the U.S. Ambassador’s residence in Lusaka, a highly posh affair, while wearing chitenge pants so brightly colored that they were visible from space. We ate breakfast on what were quite possibly the nicest dishes I’ve ever seen. Because I was too classy to steal some china, I snatched a few napkins embossed with the United States seal instead.

-Spent a ton of kwacha during a brief Manda Hill Mall shopping trip on specialty items that can only be found in Lusaka (mostly spices and a few kitchen supplies, though there were some other random things like fitted bed sheets and camp chairs).

-Parted ways with friends in my RAP ’13 intake that I’ve come to really bond with over these past few months. Won’t see most of them again until IST (In-Service Training) in September.

-Drove 11 hours from Lusaka up to Mansa, the provincial capital of Luapula Province, stuffed into a cruiser with seven other people and all of our gear. We woke up before the sun even thought about coming out, some of us in better health/with less of a hangover than others, and arrived at the provincial house long after the sun had disappeared beyond the horizon.

-Spent an entire day shopping for posting and freaking ourselves out as we watched our kwacha dwindle to dangerously low numbers. I now own a mattress, a wicker chair, buckets for drawing water, basins for washing, a hammer and nails and wire for home improvement projects, a Dutch oven, and enough rice and split peas to feed me for the next three months.

-Acquired about 50 GB of new music and e-books from fellow volunteers in anticipation of Community Entry. Community Entry lasts for three months after you’re posted and during this time you aren’t allowed to leave your district, so along with doing a lot of meeting and greeting people you also burn through books and music at a prodigious rate. Bet when you envisioned a bunch of Peace Corps volunteers together in the middle of sub-Saharan Africa, you didn’t picture a group of nerds presiding over a dining room table bristling with laptops and external hard drives and flash drives intertwined, didja?

-Watched my fellow new volunteers depart for their sites all around me. Chris and Jacob were posted on Tuesday, and Lucas was posted today. Ryeon and Michael leave tomorrow, and with several other volunteers leaving over the past two days, the house already feels empty with just the three of us plus Siobhan, our fearless PCVL, holding down the fort. I may very well have the entire house to myself tomorrow after Ryeon and Michael are posted in the morning.